I want a baby, but I drank a little.

It’s been four days since our second IUI.  I’ve drank three of those nights.  I know this isn’t great, and I normally don’t drink that often.  But Thursday was our anniversary (4 years!), I had margaritas with a girlfriend on Friday, and last night Ian had a work party.  
For most of this “trying to get pregnant” journey, I’ve done everything I could to get pregnant.  I didn’t drink, I tried my darnedest to eat healthy, I had acupuncture, I took prenatal vitamins.  And it’s not that I’m throwing all those things out, but this time I’m just trying to live my life.  I think part of the depression of infertility stems from the obsession of doing everything right.  It steals my joy and and then devastates me when, even though I did everything right, it still wasn’t enough.

But anyways, like I said, we did our second IUI.  Ian’s motility was low, but his count was so high that it didn’t matter.  I did a round of Clomid during cycle days 3-7, I had zero side effects this time – so I was afraid I wasn’t responsive.  Then I had my follicular scan on cycle day 13, nothing was “ready” on the right side, but I had one mature follicle on the left measuring 18.5mm.  In all honesty, I have a relatively regular cycle and seemed to be ovulating normally before all this, so I don’t know that the Clomid is doing anything for me.  I keep hoping it will give me more than one mature egg, but as long as I keep getting at least one, it’s not hurting to take it.

I took Ovidrel that same evening and went in for the IUI on cycle day 15.  This is earlier than I normally ovulate (when tracking with ovulation tests, I tested positive anywhere between days 16 and 19).  Which makes me wonder if naturally, I have some level of luteal phase defect – but I have no clue and Googling is zero help.  I brought this up to the nurse who did our first IUI because I had my period about 12.5 days after I took the Ovidrel the first time, but she said that wasn’t abnormal.

Fingers crossed for a different result this time.  We have so many people praying and sending out positive vibes for us – if you’re one of those folks, know that we love you and appreciate you so much.

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